I love reading The New York Times and seeing the daily nuances of politicians and celebrities: what they had for breakfast, what size coffee they drank whether it was black, de-caf, specialty; who they spoke to, what they did, what they bought at the grocery store, what they wore - I mean it is truly an exercise in riveting ribaldry when I look to find news and other worldly elements and well, I am given an education on the names of the rabbits and the kinds of dogs celebs and polits are looking for. Who woulda thunk? On the front page of a paper no less.
So, in the jest of a good humor monologue, below is a day in my life, me: c.a.thorson, part time pr gal, part-time cook and scullery maid, full time mom and woeful wife, part time launderette with a really bad track record on socks and a host of other sundry job titles.
First off when I pop out of bed it is probably pretty frightening. It was a bit cool last night so I pulled out all stops and put on my polar bear flannel PJs – doesn’t get more seductive than that let me tell you. I think my husband had stripes on his flannel PJs- we are truly a hot fashion forward flannel family here. So after hopping out of bed, with associated creaks of various joints I might add, the snap crackle and pop of the rice crispy cereal has nothing on me, I made my way to a quick stop at the loo. We will leave it there.
Then there is a two minute gargle with Listerine (Are you not just engrossed in this amazing minutiae of details- aren’t you just riveted by this point?) Then my day really kicks into high gear:
6:00 a.m. up with the birds, morning sun salutations and deep cleansing breaths, a few downward dogs and cobras to get the blood flowing.
6:30 a.m. Pack lunch for Dear Husband (DH). Dear Son (DS) has a four day holiday – which means no school today or tomorrow which means no need to pack a lunch.)
6:45 a.m. – empty dishwasher and put clean dishes and cups and cutlery away.
7:00 a.m. – sweep floor and remove chairs from kitchen in order to prepare for the task at hand: Washing the floor!! It doesn’t get better than this folks. I love love love having a clean floor and it is well past time. After three buckets of steaming hot water I declare the floor clean. I should add that my entire downstairs consists of travertine which looks nice when it is not replete with sticky spots of Gatorade, dried bits of lettuce and who knows what else.
8:15 a.m. receive morning kiss from DH before he trots off to work. DS has been diligently working on a study guide for an upcoming test on the human body and its various systems. In between the slosh of the water in the bucket I feign interest in knowing what the purpose of the skeletal system is: "Support" is his answer. All I can think of is creaks. I keep this to myself however. "What is the purpose of the respiratory system Mom?" He asks. "To prevent me from having a heart attack?" I question as I attack a stubborn stain at the bottom of the kitchen sink.
"Um, no, it is to help you breath - take in oxygen and breathe out carbon dioxide," he informs me. "Good to know," I respond.
I could go on with the extremely fascinating take on my day, but I think you all have pretty much zoned off…sweet dreams dear readers…sweet dreams.
I am off to attack a few porcelain pots….