Oops...I did it again...

I haven’t done it for a while. Come to think about it, it has probably been six or seven months. Maybe even longer.

It’s not like I haven’t been tempted or thought about it, frankly I have tried to avoid situations where I am prone to possibly committing the act.

What act is that you ask? Oh, silly me. I thought you knew. If you have ever been inside a Trader Joe’s store or a local Albertson’s and possibly even a large department store, then you more than likely are in the know and just don’t know it.

Like the time you reached into the freezer section to grab a bottle of milk and whoosh, like a blast of cold air you turn back to your cart to find it has mysteriously, magically, maybe not so magically – disappeared.

Thanks to – yours truly – the cart snatcher.

Now, in my own defense, I will admit that I am not the best at paying attention to what I have placed in my cart or were I have actually left the four wheeled jalopy as I in my own personal quest for organic low fat milk or free range eggs cluck like a chicken examining packaging and expiration dates. I truly can get caught up in the moment and then deposit my items in the nearest cart.

Often not realizing the nearest cart may not be my own.

Until well, take for example yesterday. I was in my neighborhood Trader Joe’s in search of milk. The three half gallons I had bought a mere two days before had disappeared from the homestead. And since I don’t drink milk as a rule, then it had to be the boys in the house – my Dear Husband (DH) and my Dear Son (DS). They need their calcium and must have strong bones.

I was browsing through the Greek yogurt selection in search of the honey flavored one which was my personal favorite. I scored a couple and headed back to my cart- or what I thought was my cart. I didn’t have much time before needing to pick up DS from school so I made a quick maneuver between two little ladies with droopy stockings and a toddler who had had one glass of juice too many when I felt a small tug at my sleeve.

“Excuse me, but I think you took my cart by mistake.”

I turned to see a black haired woman with licorice eyes smiling at me.

“Oops,” I said. “I am so sorry. I have a bad habit of doing that.”

And as I glanced inside the belly of the cart I realized that pork chops and ham would not be items making their way to my house any time soon. And the cat food and cat litter should have been a definite tip off.

“No problem,” said the lady as she steered her cart as far away from me as possible.

“I guess I better go and try and find my cart now,” I said.

And I trotted back from whence I came- the freezer section. There standing forlornly against the free range eggs sign was a cart with a head of orange carrots peeking out from the spokes of the cart. I could see the green carrot hats flopping dejectedly over the side of the front seat of the carriage. And poking up from the rear of the cart were three bottles of milk and two yogurts.

“Oh joy,” I thought to myself.

I noticed that there seemed to be a gap between myself and the rest of the patrons in the store. As if someone had spread the secret that the cart snatcher was on the loose. Beware; guard your cart with your life.

I looked around furtively and did a double step to the checkout counter praying to the grocery gods to let me sink into the floor like any second – like now…..